Chef Shares The Conversation She Had With Her Married Colleague That Made Her Realise Most Women Are Suffering In The Name Of Marriage

A Nigerian chef has taken to social media to narrate how she discovered that most married women are suffering in the hands of their husbands.

The chef, identified as @omowo on Twitter, relayed this with a conversation she had with a married colleague in her industry.

According to the chef who is still single, her colleague advised her to maximize her single years and take as many catering jobs as she can now because once she get married, she won’t have the liberty anymore, as her husband will likely stop her from taking certain jobs.

@omowo said she was quite surprised at the advice and asked her colleague if her husband would ask her to turn down jobs so they can spend quality time together, but the friend said no, explaining that the husband might simply wake up and decided that she should stay at home.

When she asked the friend if the husband will also stay at home with her after preventing her from going out, her friend told her, “he will go out but you can’t go anywhere”.

She tweeted,

“I can never forget someone in my industry telling me to do all the events I can now because when I get married there will be days my husband will tell me I can’t go for an event.

I asked why, maybe we had plans or something, She said he can just wake up and decide he didn’t want me to leave the house that day. I was like Awww to spend time with him abi she said no, he will go out but you can’t go anywhere.

That was when I knew that most women are seeing shege in the name of marriage. I’ve been looking at her with pity since then.”

Reacting to the tweet, a married man wrote:

“It’s often not about the money. Most women work. Many are even breadwinners of their family. It’s more about the inbred sense of entitlement and arrogance of some of us and how women are raised to accept oppression and even cheating as the norm.

I am raising my daughters to be different. Let me see the man that will try nonsense with them. It even extends beyond wife. We see it even among commercial drivers— very quick to slap a female passenger whom they feel has sharp mouth because “I get her type for house.” And claim that her sharp mouth pushed them. Let their female boss have the same sharp mouth and they will do nothing. That is the trait of a bully.

This is why most Nigerian men that are based abroad will prefer to leave their wives in Nigeria because women are treated like humans abroad. If I eventually relocate, it will be to remove my daughters from such an environment. But things are changing.

It can’t be helped. Globalization is catching up to Nigeria and with that arrogance of so many men in the face of more women being independent, it is only a matter of time before many men grow old to find themselves in the shoes of men like Matthew Knowles— fathered kids all over the place from their cheating, their kids seeing the hurt they cause their mother and never wanting to have anything to do with their father when they become adults.

A woman whom you married and then you begin to cheat on her and cause her pain, your kids see it all. Will you be happy for your daughter to go through the same treatment? Treat your woman right, like yourself. Ditto for women because it goes both ways, although the kids almost always side with their mamma, no matter how we try to make them see our point of view.”

A lady added:

It sounds bizarre, but that’s the reality of most Nigerian women. Very sad. It’s not love, it’s witchcraft.

ALSO SEE: What This Woman Did After Her Husband Insisted She Signs Off Her Inheritance To Him Barely A Month Into Their Marriage Earns Other Women Nods

A married woman wrote:

Don’t be scared, there are quite a lot of women also enjoying their marriages. many men will support you and even be your escort if they are free and there’s mutual respect in the union. Ensure you marry your friend and a man who has the fear of God. Quite a lot of my friends have supportive husbands, so do I.

My friends and I all live in our personal houses which we either built together or bought together with our spouses( I’m in my early 40s) . Be positive minded. Marriage has its own challenges as no one of us is perfect but nothing so hard that we cannot tolerate or overlook.