Dear MIMsters: Should I Expose Pastor D As Suggested By My Husband Or Should I Follow My Instinct?

A few days after Busola Dakolo granted her “no-holds back, all spilling” interview on how the COZA pastor, Biodun Fatoyinbo had allegedly raped her, I got a call from the blues, a pastor D.

It was an unknown number calling me and as a matter of principle, I rarely answer unknown calls but something (which I wish I had ignored) urged me to pick the call; most especially because the caller was persistent. Within 2 minutes, he had called me three times.

The voice at the other end sounded slightly familiar and the following conversation ensued:

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Caller: “Hello, is that Mary?”

Me: “Who is asking?”

Caller: “Mary! Don’t tell me you can’t place my voice again? How long has it been? Isn’t it less than a decade?”

Me: “Will you please introduce yourself so that I can get back to what I was doing?”

Caller: “No problem. This is your favourite pastor D!” (Did I just hear favourite?)

Me: “Pastor D…?” (I called his full name)

Caller: “Yes. The very one! How are you? Is it a good time to talk?”

(I felt different emotions run through my system and his next statement made me wish I really did not answer that call.)

About 8-years ago, Pastor D was scheduled to minister in a church outside base, and as one of the protocol officers on duty at the time; I was part of the entourage that traveled with him.

We all got booked into the same hotel though in different rooms. We settled in and then, assembled for an early dinner because we’d been instructed by Pastor D to retire early for the night.

However, Pastor D requested that his meal be brought to his suite and together with a male protocol officer, I delivered it to him. This is because whenever we traveled, hotel attendants were not allowed to have access to him. He is a very popular man of God and he claims he could be set up that way so it’s the responsibility of the protocol officers on his entourage to attend to him.

He soon settled to eat and we excused him. He requested that I came back to help attend to some ministry work before I finally retired for the night.

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That night, when I returned to help him as he requested of me, Pastor D raped me!

And the following morning, Pastor D ministered at the conference powerfully. People got saved, healed and they testified. But as for me, I was numb all through. I couldn’t reconcile the man who sexually abused me the previous night with the ‘anointed’ man of God behind the pulpit. During his ministration, I doubted my own sanity. I thought I’d probably imagined what happened and I ensured to maintain a good distance from him all through our stay.

Immediately we returned to base, I quit the church and I never told anyone about it until he called me last week.

He was calling to offer me some money to remain silent. He also offered to buy me a brand new car and sponsor me on a trip to any part of the world I may desire. He only asked that I do not rattle him out for what he did to me.

I hung up on him and tears rolled freely down my eyes. My husband walked in on me crying and inquired to know what was wrong with me. Left with no other choice, for the first time ever, I had to tell my husband everything. He was enraged! He expressed his disappointment that I never told him about it but then, he wanted to know my decision and I told him I don’t want to ever have anything to do with Pastor D, ever again. I do not want his money, or any other things from him. And I also do not wish to expose him. I said I was leaving him to God but my husband wouldn’t hear of it. He insists I must do what Busola did, and we have been going back and forth about it ever since.

Meanwhile, Pastor D has not stopped calling me though I have refused to pick his call again. I don’t think I can cope with exposing Pastor D. This is not about protecting his image, but about my own sanity. I cannot imagine myself going through what Busola has been going through and I honestly don’t see my husband as magnanimous as Timi Dakolo. I don’t think he would be able to fight for me the way that man is fighting for his wife. Yet he is insisting that I must speak out.