Dear MIMsters: Turns Out My Husband Lied & Indeed Raped My Friend
I wrote in recently, asking for advice on how to get even with a friend I thought was trying to ruin my marriage by pressing rape charges against my husband (read here). I was wrong! Sadly, it turns out my husband indeed raped her as alleged. I am still in great shock.
I went to our lawyer this morning to find out about the video that the woman on MIM Facebook page was talking about. He showed me and I couldn’t finish watching it. I cried throughout, seeing how he treated her babies and raped her repeatedly. I also listened to him saying he enjoys the hunting feeling – the woman was running from him and he was chasing her, and obviously, that turned him on. My husband has always been very rough when it comes to lovemaking and I now understand why.
I have since gone to the hospital to see the woman. The children run from every black person they see except their mum. It is very evident that they are very traumatised. I have asked her to forgive me but she walked me out of her hospital room. Her husband almost slapped me but controlled himself.
I have been very depressed. Not because of my husband but the woman and her children. They are not in good shape at all and her husband is not ashamed of showing his feelings. He was kneeling by her bed, crying. I will go back again but with some people to help me beg her over my behaviour.
The truth is, we were not close friends. We just said hi to each other and I started buying from her. I somehow knew that she was saying the truth when she told me in front of my husband and hers that my husband made a move on her. Sincerely, my hubby really didn’t defend himself. He was shamefully looking downwards that day, and when we talked about it later, he denied it. Somehow, I took to self-denial to protect my marriage.
My husband has already been sentenced to 15 years imprisonment and he’ll be deported after he serves his sentence. Our marriage is over. I have called his family to tell them the truth. We cursed an innocent woman for nothing. The video is enough evidence.
I’m very sorry for my previous outbursts. Just wanted to update you all and clear my conscience.
Sad
If I am the woman in the hospital, the next time you come visiting, I will order for your arrest so that you and your husband can both be deported because you are a monster just like your husband. If the woman on MIM Facebook page hadn’t spoken out and challenged you, I doubt you would have come back to say you have realized. You knew the truth all along you were just blaming the woman for nothing now that someone challenged you, you are here to say you are sorry after allowing myself and a few other people see the other woman has evil. You and your husband have caused so much damage to a woman and her children and her family. May God have mercy on you both.
She is going through a lot already. She’s not responsible for her husband’s choices and as a sensible person you wld first protect your own.. She has realized the truth and her mistake so she making every possible effort to make right the situation.
Protecting her own by calling and insulting the woman without getting to the root of the matter my foot.
You are just like her. Didnt you read you stated she knew the truth all along? You the kind of woman that will jump into conclusion without getting to the bottom first.
I am surprised you see things in this light. This woman did not commit the crime, her husband did. The fact that she did not agree that her husband could be a rapist but later agreed, went to the woman to apologise, will still go back to apologise and went out of her way to write back to us, and apologise is all that matters. When a child wrongs you, beat him with one hand and use the other to draw him back to your bosom.
Let not anger becloud our judgements sometimes.
I knew it. This is exactly what I said in my comment. Take heart sha but I’m sure you’ve learnt a thing or 2 in this. Don’t go to them yet as tempers are still high but you could send people on your behalf. If you have the means please foot their hospital bills. That will go a long way to show your remorse
What a sad turn of event
Only if you know what rape does to the victims, you will know that going close to that woman is making the situation worst for her, because she sees your husband in you, so your presence brings back the horrendous encounter she had with your husband…You just have to tender your apologies from afar, then pray to God not allow the sins of your husband visit his children. P.S: That woman and her kids need a lot of therapy before they can come back to their right mind, especially the kids that are now running away from every black person they see. To be honest, your husband has done so much damage to the minds of those kids, why rape their mother in their presence, that is so evil. It will take the grace of God and a very good therapist to bring them out of that trauma. #enoughsaid
I intentionally did not comment on your previous post because I sensed you weren’t being completely truthful. I mean NOBODY is that vindictive. The fact that you even accused that woman of lying showed you were living in denial. You blinded your eyes to what was happening right in front of you to protect a sick deranged man, all in the name of marriage. Now that family is scarred for life and you want to be forgiven. Shame on you for aiding and abetting a rapist. May you reap what you have sown.
Amen.
very sad good u ended things with him. but pray for the woman so God would strengthen her.
I thought about this matter this morning, something was saying to me that your almighty husband you were trying to cover his ass is guilty. Let the woman be for now, don’t aggravate her anger by going close to he because you can’t imagine the extent of her pains.
Pls how can one send an anonymous message to Motherhood in style Magazine pls?
this is so sad
Dear MIMsters:AM I BEING RUDE.Am a young lady in my late twenties who got maried for seven months now.l last had a miscariage and resently had a misundustanding wit my huby which he asked me to leave.l left not because l wanted to or was full of myself but because I wanted him to stop that attitude of always sacking and me rendering apologies all de time.But after de issue was been resolve,I was taken to his moms place by his elders and upon getting there they ask me to go and visit his Aunte( his moms younger sister.)This woman gave me many insults and even said l was the one who aborted that pregnancy.l became very angry and burst into tears and ask her whether she will ever say that to her daughter and she said my question is an insult to her.I return to his moms place crying and they didn’t say a word t me so l went out and call my uncle and told him what happen and he also got angry and call one of the elders who took me there complain to him and after some few minutes my uncle said the elder took my number to call and console me but it wasn’t going through.So I went inside and took my belongings to leave.My mother inlaw thought l was going back to my house and quickly block me and ask me what happen when l went to her sister which l did told her and she was like u didn’t tell me upon your return and who did u call on your phone.when l told her it was my uncle she ask me to call him for her which l did and they talk over it.I also told her that l thought they plan it all.She seemed to have felt sorry and was consoling me and asking other people to console me as well.About a week later after l left the village and return to my huby,his sister who resides in a different region called asking me to either take the aunte’s number call and apologize to her or go to the village and apologies to her l didn’t say a word to her.After sometime my hoby too ask me to go and apologize to her which l refuse and say lwill never apologize to her untill she apologize to me.
My reason is that l
felt and still fell very hurt for the accusation and l also want them to keep thier mouths off our issues and also for my talkative husband to stop discussing us to his family.please l need your advice.