What a Mother Told Her Son a Day Before His Wedding

Mummy’s boy, you are now a man. Tomorrow you will have a new mother, cook and person to share all your secrets with. It will no longer be me but her. Love your new mum even more than you love me.

Before you walk into her arms forever, let me give you some words to guide you.

There was a day I was arguing with your father we were screaming, tempers were high. I was angry and he was too. Then I called him an idiot! He was shocked. He looked at me asking how dare I call him that. I called him even more names, and guess what he did? He didn’t raise his hands to hit me, he just walked away and banged the door as he left.

My son, if your father had hit me and destroyed my eyes, how will you feel sitting here with me today? How will you regard him as your father? Would you have been proud of him or blamed me for calling him names? Never hit your wife! Whenever she offends you, think of this story I just told you – it could have been your mum! So, no matter the provocation, just walk away and things will be normal.

Before I forget, after he left, I was filled with guilt. We slept on the same bed that night and I went to him the
next day. I pleaded with him. I did all I could to show I’m sorry and he forgave me. That day I cooked his favourite food. Yes, you know he loves Affang soup right? After that day, I never called him names; my respect for him was ten times stronger.

Also, my son, always do listen very carefully and defend your wife. When she is under pressure, stand by her. If your friends hate her, it is your duty to make them see her as a Queen. Your Uncle, I mean Uncle Udeme never liked me but your father was always supportive until his perception changed.

There was also a day your Father was going to host the owner of his company and friends. They were three of them. That day I was in the kitchen cooking for them and your father went to buy drinks. When the table was set and food was served, everyone started eating. Then I remembered I did not add salt in the food. I was embarrassed. Your father tasted the food and looked at me. He immediately turned to the guests and told them that he had instructed me last month not to add salt to my cooking because of some problem with his health. He said it in a funny way and everyone laughed!

The guests understood and he asked me to bring salt and everyone added according to their taste. He managed to eat the food without salt. After the guest left, he went on his knees and asked God to forgive him for lying. Your wife is like a baby, sometimes she don’t know what to say or do. Stand up and speak for her!

Now, let me talk to you about sex. You see, sex is a wonderful thing. Do not be surprised if your wife enjoys and needs it more than you do. There were days I needed sex more than your father and there were days he needed it more than me but the important thing is to always try to satisfy the each other when the need arises. Don’t always think of yourself.

There was a time things were hard and I needed to do two jobs to support your father. One night I was so tired and when I got to bed, he was in the mood. He tried to make love to me and I didn’t refuse him. I was tired but felt I needed to be there when he needs me. When he tried undressing me, he saw my look and stopped. He asked what was wrong and I said nothing but he understood me better. He stopped and then started telling me stories until I fell asleep.

My son, sex is best enjoyed when the two parties are physically and mentally ready for it. Sometimes, read your wife and understand her. Make it a habit to go anywhere with her and if anyone invites you to their house and tells you not to come with your wife, be very careful. Apply wisdom.

In addition, I know you love mummy. I know you tell me all your problems but now things will be different. Let your wife be the first to know before me. Let her be the first to see before me. When you have problems with her, don’t run to me immediately. Wait for a day to pass and then talk to her about it. Pray about it.

Finally, don’t forget to come and visit me with your wife every month! I know you will have a happy home. You will always be mummy’s boy.