Dear MIMsters: Should I Marry This Divorced Dad-Of-Two Or Just Keep Searching?

I am a 33-year-old lady. I completed my National Youth Service 5 years ago but have been a hustler since then because I don’t have a good job yet.

I have been in several relationships which didn’t work out since 2007, after my wedding plans with my then fiancé failed – his people had insisted they don’t want another tribe though we loved each other. I subsequently decided to let go.

I am presently dating a divorcée who is 9 years older than I am. We’ve been together for about 2 years now and he has been proposing to marry me but I am hesitant because I feel I don’t want to marry a married man. Even at the beginning when he started asking me out, I told him I can’t go out with a married man but he still insisted and before I knew it, we started dating.

He is naturally a good and caring person and according to investigations I carried out through neighbours and friends, the wife didn’t leave his house because he fought her or sent her away but because she wanted to control him. She is this type of woman who feels because she is from a wealthy family and all her brothers are in US, she can dictate to her husband. She sold things he bought in the house like one of their cars, washing machine and so on, without telling him, and travels up and down without telling him her movements. She even applied for her visa without telling him.

They were married for 12 years and got married before her brothers became wealthy. He was the one that gave her a job and also opened a shop for her. After she left the house for almost a year, she came back with her father to take their two kids; a girl and boy.

Please, I am confused because as a young lady, I want to have a church wedding and marry an equally young guy. However, there’s no serious relationship on ground now except the one with the divorcée. He is a wonderful and nice man. Should I marry him as time is running out or keep waiting for the man of my dreams? Please I need your advice.