Dear MIMsters: I Have Bent Backwards to Please My Husband and What Is He Doing?

I have bent backwards to please my husband and what is he doing to me?

I’m 24 years old who got married at 17. I have 2 children who are with my mum back home because I’m currently in the University and still a freshman. Hubby only got to earn his B.A after we got married. He told me that ever since we got married, his luck has increased and ”GOD” made things easier for him now than when he was single.

Now that he is working and sometimes hides from me. The problem is that my husband doesn’t like taking me out no matter what the circumstance not even our Anniversaries. I have talked to him about it, fought, explained how I feel, cried, kept malice with but he still doesn’t care. He tells me that it’s expensive outside.

I am a beautiful woman and I take care of myself as much as I can. I found out his password and discovered that he likes chatting with women and goes ahead to invite them for a date. I confronted him 3 months ago. I pretended as if someone who knew one of the girls told me about it. He apologized and I let it go.

Two weeks ago, he was talking to another woman and suddenly changed his attitude towards me. He got to meet her and came back at 1 a.m. I couldn’t sleep or read that night knowing where he was. I called my aunty who told me that my Uncle cheats on her too and she advised me to confront him in the morning. I did and he started shedding crocodile tears and apologized. After this, he took me out twice because of ‘’SHAME.’’

He got to know this woman when he was studying and she would sometimes visit us. I have observed that whenever this woman tells my husband to take her out, he agrees even when he’s busy. I noticed it and he ignored it. We went out with her earlier this month to the movies, while I was there, I started joking with him. He got ‘’ANGRY’’ and called me a MUMU in our language.

He pleased her in front of me and stopped talking to me that night right in her presence but when she talks to him, he responds. He even went to drop her off at home and her house is 30 minutes’ drive away from where we live. We had a bitter fight that night, he insulted me and I paid him back. He tried to hit me but couldn’t because we were still in the car.

This same woman wrote to me last week. I ignored her and told my husband who called me while he was at work yesterday. He told me to respond to her message asking to have dinner with us. He did this, not knowing that I had I read their conversation earlier. He had told her that I’m writing my exams, so I would not be able to go but they could go ahead and have dinner together. Meanwhile, he’s getting angry with me for ignoring this woman’s message.

I confronted him last night and told him not to tell me about her. We quarrelled and he hit me for the first time but it was not painful.

This is a man who has fought with some of his friends simply because I communicate with them. He stopped inviting them over and would rather visit them. He gets angry and complains whenever I talk to men, even to those that I have known all my life. Out of respect for him, I had to tell them that my husband doesn’t like me talking to them and they understood. He would even complain when I’m on the phone with my family for 30 minutes or more.

Men always approach me, but I don’t give them any chance because I believe GOD is watching and I can die at any time. I am beginning to lose it and can no longer concentrate on my studies and I don’t know what to do. I’m not planning to quit because of my children, I still love him and the grass is not greener on the other side. Mr. Johnson Onyedikachi looking forward for your comment. Admin, please comment too.