Dear MIMsters: How Much More Should a Woman Tolerate Just to Stay Married?

How much more should a woman tolerate just to stay married? I have been married to this man for 15 years now but I had child birth delay for 11 years. He’s been cheating on me for long, to the extent that he had a child from another woman who is now married to another man.

He gave me 200k last year in October to start a business, and since then, he’s not been giving me money regularly for the running of our home. Initially it was 50k, now, it’s 10k, 5k for the next two months. I have been managing because of the investments, hoping that things will get better when stabilized.

He works in a construction firm and earns well. One of his workers lives with us and I feed him from my business revenue.

I found out something shocking about him. He returned from a trip to Adamawa and I asked him for my car key. He told me to check the back pocket of his trousers. There, I saw his international passport. I decided to flip through it and noticed that he travelled to South Africa in April, and I didn’t know. He walked in just then, collected the passport from me. He asked me what I was doing with his passport and I asked him what was he hiding.

The following day when he was not at home, I took my time to check his bag very well and I saw the bag tag which shows that he just arrived back from SA again on the 9th of Aug.

He doesn’t know I know that I know. Sincerely, I am tired of his infidelity.

One Saturday, we had an event to go for, I rushed out to see a friend before we set out, we prepared and rushed out of the house, I forgot my purse at home, so I asked him for N200. Come and see as he rained insults on me like water that day, because of N200 to buy Golden Morn for our 4 year old daughter that was with us.

He said I have never added value to him, that there’s nothing good in me, this has been his national anthem to me. This is a man I stood by when there was nothing and I’m not a lazy woman, I know that.