Toolz On Why “Being Married Is Not The Ultimate Goal Of Life.” We So Agree
Nigerian radio personality, talk show host and presenter, Tolu Oniru-Demuren, popularly known as Toolz, has taken to social media to share an important nugget with singles.
Taking into cognizance the pressure family and society put on young men and women to get married, the 36-year old woman, who called 2017 the toughest year of her life advised her followers on Instagram not to succumb, stating that ‘being married is not the ultimate goal of life.’
Toolz wrote:
“Imagine letting people rush you into marriage…only to end up miserable with the wrong person….and then the people that pressured/rushed you leave you to deal with your mess?? Don’t let anyone rush you…. ❤”
READ ALSO:”Nigerian Men Want a Wife Who Can Support them Financially” – Toolz
Most of Toolz‘s followers agreed with her post, with some sharing harrowing stories of how some people who succumbed to pressure are finding it difficult to keep it together.
See some of the comments below:
“Hey ma’am, your opinion on this subject is priceless. Absolutely. This crazy practice has to stop. Heres my story. I have a dear cousin (Kelly, real name withheld for his safety) who was ‘seemingly pressurized’ by his parents to get married just before he turned 40, but apparently, he was afraid of something. And his fears he got. They didn’t court. This young man is godly and very friendly, very. But the ‘lady’ (I’m struggling to call her that) is not. But she had all that pretense the few times they came visiting. Both have good jobs. Kelly (Glo) Jane (not real) Mobil. But hey! Anything could trigger tensions. Our ‘friend’ can initiate a fight anywhere, over something as little as, ‘baby, I forgot my wallet at home, could you help me get some toiletries? Then the lid goes off, ‘you’re the man, you’re supposed to take care!’ Doesn’t care who hears the stupid argument. I’m not biased in anyway, telling this story, I’m not. We are very few in our family and do things closely. Now, she’s barred his family through her actions and tendency to fight Kelly if any of us pays a visit. Jane doesn’t want his friends, including her own family and friends, she suspects every body in feminine gear. Kelly has had it rough. Head opened twice. First time, mug. second time, piston, and left for dead. Kelly has been unstable emotionally, He requested for a transfer from Lagos to Delta. Just under 2 years he put in his resignation against all pleas, and returned to Lagos because Jane wouldn’t let him have access to the kids (stupid, some of us thought but we don’t pray to wear those shoes). And that was the string. Today he’s out of job, slides in and out of depression. In fact, he has seen the ‘Oba of Benin’ (suffered). This sad experience motivated me into developing some kind of material/awareness to fight this unfortunate practice. I’ve just finished it. I’d would appreciate it if I could share with you first if you so wish, and hear your thoughts and perhaps find out how best to circulate it. Parental/societal pressures over marriage has got to stop!”
READ ALSO:Check Out Toolz’ Epic Response to a Fan Who Asks if she is Pregnant
“I am 24 year old nd my mom is already reporting me to my pastor that I am nt serious abt getting married and he should advice/pray for me. Please ask my mom Dat wat have I done with my life that I want to become a liability to my husband.. I warned her that I will stop picking her calls if she doesn’t stop with the incessant disturbance. JST 24 ooo”
READ ALSO:Toolz Appreciates Her Supportive Husband on His Birthday: “You are my strength”
And as expected, some other people have contrary opinion.
See below:
“But still is good to be married, in every ladies life there is a particular time when the good n responsible guys flock around you. Once u miss it by doing shakara,and having fun. You begin to post this kind of message and even supporting it.a womans life is like a flower.be wise”
