Dear MIMsters: How My Husband Pushed Me Into Adultery And Why I Am Loving It | Part Two
Continued from Part One: My husband pushed me into adultery and I am loving it.
He resurfaced and we kinda picked it up from where we left it off.
I asked about his ‘abroad’ girlfriend and if he still had plans of marrying her but he told me they were over.
I would later find out that the girl called it off because her best friend in Nigeria had told her how her supposed boyfriend was jumping from bed to bed, and even attempted to sleep with her, too.
Anyways, I was stupidly in love to even attempt to carry out any investigation on my own.
I remember a night I was in his house and one of his girlfriends came around, he asked me to give him a few minutes to end things with her and foolish me said, it was fine. I stepped out for them to talk and…
After about 30 minutes, the girl (A really young girl at that) walked past me and dear boyfriend strolled behind her to meet me. When I complained about what he just did, he told me he had to spend some time with her to pacify her that they had to break up that night because he has a woman he wanted to marry.
READ ALSO: Dear MIMsters: How My Husband Pushed Me Into Adultery And Why I Am Loving It
Over time, I saw different girls come and go whenever I was with him at his place and he would always tell me he was ending his affair with them one after the other. Looking back now, I cannot fathom what happened to that strong woman I was before I got involved with him; I mean, how could I have allowed a man treat me the way he did then still get married to him?
A week after our one year wedding anniversary, he laid his hands on me for the first time and I was too shocked to even cry, I just laid on the floor, stunned!
His second time of beating me was when our first child was about 12-weeks old. We have been married for more than 10-years now and it keeps going from bad to worse.
I am responsible for 80% financial running of our home. He would keep malice with me whenever he feels like and it could last for as long as 2 to 3 months. In all of these, I have lost my self esteem. I have lost the will to live but I get by because of my children; they are my only reason for living.
I have lived with this pain for more than ten years- physical abuse, emotional abuse, financial abuse, social abuse… I mean, all forms of abuse.
Recently, I stumbled on his chat with his then ‘abroad’ girlfriend who is now divorced. In their chat, my husband was begging her and asking her to find a place in her heart for him. She asked him some questions about me and my husband told him all she wanted to know and even more, including all about my children. He also sent her our pictures but the woman said she was done with him.
There was another time I found out about a girl he was seeing and I complained as his wife. What did he tell me? He said the woman was everything I was not. As much as I tried to keep it together, he kept frustrating me.
What have I not done for this guy? I got financial assistance for him many times over, I got businesses registered for him in his name, I borrowed to pay house rent and offset bills, and all these is unknown to family and friends; I kept covering up his tracks. As I write, I still have debts I am servicing which I took on his behalf.
You know, one of my friends once teased me of praying too much for my husband. Whenever my friends and I come together to pray, once it’s my turn, I would go “My husband’s business should receive life… My husband’s this, My husband’s that…”
Remember I said I am responsible for 80% financial running of our home, now, his business has picked up but he still would not step into his responsibilities.
Men slide into my DM but I ignore them and block the persistent ones. I even go as far as to show him those chats and he would just laugh it off.
One day, sad and beaten, I was on Facebook when this message came into my inbox. Unlike me, that day, I checked out the man’s profile and I liked what I saw. I responded to him and we got chatting. We moved it from chatting to telephone calls, then to meeting up somewhere to keep each other’s company.
My supposed husband has not spoken to me for almost three months now even though we sleep in the same house. He goes out when he wants and returns whenever he desires which used to be an issue for me until now.
My new guy is everything and I am not taking chances. He is patient with me and respects me a lot. He is decent, too. I do not want commitments and I have made it known to him that all I want is a man to give me a good good body work (Laughing so hard) and amma get me some this coming weekend.
Abeg, my mumu don do, I am getting my groove back and I’m not gonna let nothing anyone says deter me!
you’re probably justify for having extra marital affairs, I can’t judge you and I won’t judge you because am not in your shoes, but can you either divorce your husband and continue with the other man or remain with your husband and put an end to their the extra marital affairs for the sake of your children, I know you won’t want your children to see you as the bad guy and your husband as the good guy after everything he has put you through.
Plz my sister thinks of your integrity, your values an the future of your children,
You are enjoying the affair now but the end result might be Humiliating disastrous, plz don’t allow that man to push you in to the pit, have even sit down to consider weather the other mania a setup for you? please put an end to the affair before it is too late. You mention in this post that you pray which made me believe that you know God, and you know God, you agree with me that God does not support what you are doing. Thank you. Allow God to fight for you and lead you.
We all know that adultery is bad but judging from your story, I don’t know whether to jump high and be happy for you which I’m tempted to or to hold back and still tell you not to do it but rather get divorced and do whatever you want to do with a clear conscience. I’m really happy for you. I wish to say more but this is enough. Pray and do the right thing. Good luck and God be with you