Dear MIMsters: How Do I Protect My Inheritance From My Husband?
I’m married with two kids, my husband and I love each other and he is an amazing father to the kids who can do anything for them. I writing to find out how to protect my inheritance from my husband without betraying him.
I completed my first degree in Nigeria before we moved to the States. I’m unemployed. My husband doesn’t want me to work. Although, he hasn’t said so explicitly, he’s frowned at any and every job interest I might have. I learnt how to sew in Nigeria and I sew really well. I even try to keep up with the latest trends by sewing styles for myself at home. I tried sewing for a few ladies at the church and he frowned at it, so I stopped.
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My husband and I have been together for almost a decade. He says He doesn’t want me doing menial jobs here in the States, rather he wants me to work in an office. He has his papers but I don’t have mine yet so I can’t look for the office job he wants me to have. I didn’t have an account or a penny to my name until recently. He buys the groceries and every little thing that’s needed in the house. Asides from the money issue, my husband is the best man I could ever wish for.
There’s this nice old white lady who I sometimes visit. I know her from my children’s hospital. She’s wealthy and kind but has no family. I visit her twice a week just to sit and talk with her. I take my kids with sometimes too. She’ll bake cookies or cake for my kids and they adore her. She even taught my youngest how to play board games.
This old lady passed away a few months ago. I was shocked when the executor of her Estate called me and told me that she left a sum of money, $40k to me and I’m at loss as to what to do with the money. If my husband knows about the money, the money will finish.
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I recall shortly after we arrived here from Nigeria a few years ago, my Mom sent me about $3k to use for my papers and I told my husband about it. He borrowed and borrowed this money from me without paying anything back until there was nothing left of it.
If I tell him now about the $40k I inherited from this old lady, it will vanish and I intend to use some of the money to do a contract marriage for my papers. Please how do I go about it? He can’t file for my papers because he also has a contract marriage running that he cannot end just yet, at least not till another two years. The money is in an account that I opened after I was contacted. I haven’t touched it. I need you to advice me on what to do. If I keep quiet about it and he eventually finds out, it might seem like a betrayal, won’t it?
Dont you dare tell him.
The 3K your mum sent to you should be a lesson.
You are really in a bad situation and you may not realize it.
You are not married to him in a way recognized by the country you reside in.
He is still in a subsisting marriage. You have no rights.
You have no papers.
You have no job with the guaranteed job security.
He does not want you to take up any job or handicrafts.
He can deal with you and you could be badly hurt, stranded or even deported.
Please leave that money as a nest egg. Do not ever let him know about it because it will come in very handy if there is any challenge in the future.
All the best.