Schools and parents often feel the pressure to cut back on play and social interaction for children, in order to get more “hard skill” instruction time in, but reports confirm it’s actually the “soft skills” that are most predictive of long-term success for children. While early education creates an important foundation for academic skills, many parents would be surprised to know that social skills are actually far more predictive of outcomes into adulthood than early academics.
For instance, astudy published in 2015showed that the social skills observed in kindergarten showed significant correlation with well-being at age 25. That’s puts such children way ahead already!
Regardless of how advanced of a reader they were or how much money their parents made, kindergarteners who demonstrated social competence were more likely to do well at school, graduate, get a job, and stay ahead in their adult life than those who showed a lower level of social competence.
Here are five important social competencies you can foster in your child:
1.How To Socialise With Others
Playis a powerful catalyst for development in the early years.By playing with others, children learn to negotiate, solve problems, take turns, share and experiment.You can help your child build these skills by making time for free play with other children.
While scheduled play dates may have their own value, children need plenty of time participating in unstructured play with other children, where they may be supervised—but not instructed—by the adults around them.
2. How To Problem-Solve
It is tempting to ride in on a white horse and solve every single semblance of a problem your child may be faced with, but you should hold on a bit. Parents are such good problem-solvers because they got SO MUCH practice over the years, kids need some of that practice too!
So the next time yourchild has a “problem’, invite them to take part in that problem-solving process.Ask them to describe what’s going on, brainstorm solutions and try one out.
Teaching a child to be a problem solver also means teaching them how not to easily quit, which is another critical “soft skill.”When we ask children how their solution is working out, we give them an opportunity to evaluate their experience and make improvements when necessary.
It is important to keep in mind research has shown that excessive screen use may interfere with a child’s ability to recognize emotions in others. So make sure that your child gets plenty of time playing and interacting face to face with other humans, rather than with pixels and lights on a screen.
Children who are perceptive to the emotions around them are also better able to get along well with others.You can foster this skill by calling attention to emotional cues and naming emotions. You could say for instance,“How do you think he felt when that happened?”.
4. How To Be Helpful
Being helpful to others requires children to look beyond themselves and recognize the needs of others. Encouraging your child to master this social skill may require as little effort as complimenting him when he does helpful gestures.
Also give your child simple opportunities to help within your family—putting away groceries, getting something from the room, then show them gratitude afterwards. Point out the helpers around you and show gratitude together to instill a value of service.
5. How To Control Their Impulses
For the better part, children only understand instant gratification, which is totally normal for their age. However, you need to help them create opportunities to practice the growing skill of delaying gratification.
For example, you may teach a child to delay gratification by making them wait before consuming a treat, but it can also be, delaying their play time!
Mum-of-four boys and childhood education specialist, Amanda Morgan suggests Movement games that require a child to stop and go like Red Light/Green Light, Dance and Freeze, helps kids to practice how to quickly shift gears and adjust to their surroundings based on prevailing conditions.
Movement games that require a child to stop and go like Red Light/Green Light, Dance and Freeze, and Simon Says give kids practice quickly shifting gears and controlling their impulses to move.
Our fast-paced society may give you the impression that your child needs to learn more academic skills—and sooner than ever before.However, the reality is that the “soft” social skills they gain in early childhood—through the slow, simple processes of playing and interacting, engaging with their families, and paying attention to the world around them—will serve them much better and for much longer.
