Dear MIMsters: Am I Just Being Paranoid Over How My Husband Is Treating My Mother?
Am I just being paranoid over how my husband is treating my mother?
I’ve been married for 6 years with 3 kids. In these 6 years, it has always been an issue between hubby and I when it comes to sending my Mummy money for Christmas. I mean always an issue and it leads to a hot argument.
We are not so rich but we are comfortable to an extent and I know my husband isn’t poor, he just always has an issue giving my mum money.
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On a normal day, he hardly sends her money unless she asks him, and before he sends money to her, he will complain and give a lot of excuses. So, let me just say that, that is his attitude. Even before he gives me money, he always complains. I’ve sat him down to talk about this his attitude of complaining but he keeps on doing it.
My issue is this, he has refused to send her anything for this Christmas and I’m really really angry and here’s why. He bought a bag of rice earlier in the month, and told me to share it amongst some people who I think would need it like widows. I also bought other things like maggi, oil, salt and added to it. I was really happy we were able to put smiles on people’s face. After all those people showed up to collect our gifts, he still did not send anything to my mum who is also a widow. His own mum is late.
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I’m going to send something to her, but I’ll let her know it is only from me while my husband will always say I should cover him up in front of my family, but I’m not doing that anymore.
Since my husband is saying that said sending something to my mum is not a do or die affair, please I want to know if I’m being paranoid over this issue. This year, 2019, he has sent my mum money just twice, which was 10k each time. I have also sent money to her at intervals but my mum thinks it was given to her by my husband.
Please advice me.
Your narrative seems incomplete. You have not explained how much you put in from your own independently sourced income that is sent to your mum; and this leads me to ask, have you got a job or a business of your own that brings in supporting fund to the family coffer? How many siblings do you have and how do they help in supporting your mum? Is your husband obligated to be responsible for your mum’s welfare? Do you sincerely express gratitude when this man sends his own money to your mum? Does your husband have a wider responsibility to his own side of the family?
Answer and go figure”!
Your narrative seems incomplete. You have not explained how much you put in from your own independently sourced income that is sent to your mum; and this leads me to ask, have you got a job or a business of your own that brings in supporting fund to the family coffer? How many siblings do you have and how do they help in supporting your mum? Is your husband obligated to be responsible for your mum’s welfare? Do you sincerely express gratitude when this man sends his own money to your mum? Does your husband have a wider responsibility to his own side of the family? Has your husband disappointed you by stopping yo be a complete mugu?
Answer and go figure”!