Dear MIMsters: My Marriage Is Crashing And I Cannot Save It
My marriage is crashing and I just cannot save it.
My hubby had an affair with a church member at the time that I had a threatened abortion and was on bed rest from the seventh week of my pregnancy up till the 39th week. He kept on denying it even I got to find out through his phone.
I confronted him when my baby was 8 months old and he apologized. I packed my things to go. Even though I am not working, I know that I can hustle to make ends meet. This disrespect is just too much.
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He called all my family members plus his entire generation. None of his family members supported him as they all love me.
He is well respected in our church. He said that the said the lady kept chatting with him and seducing him until he fell. I told him that I can also be tempted and if I fall, there would be no excuse.
This man deflowered me on our wedding night, dated me for 3 years without sex because he was claiming brother, but he can’t wait for 7 months. He even called the priest to beg me but I feel betrayed. I am so disrespectful to him now and I can’t sleep with him anymore. I no longer enjoy sex as I don’t get wet.
Apart from this, he is actually nice. He now cooks and washes the plate for me, even though I have a Help. He comes back from early, is always in church, and hangs out with me once in a week. I just wonder how he and his lover get to meet. My husband provides everything for me and my boy, and I am his next of kin. All of his assets and cars are in my name. He buys me gifts and even bought me 21k gold recently. I just finished NTSC and he gave me a huge sum of money for the business.
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My husband has sworn never to do it again and he has been crying and kneeling to apologize since March, but my heart is not in this marriage again.
Please women with experience, how do you forgive and forget? What I feel for him is pity, not love. Can I ever forgive him? If I finally leave, will I regret it later? My mum said that I am not serious that he even apologized. I am always fighting him now.
Some of us are super loyal partners and once we are betrayed, we find it difficult to forgive and let go. That been said, a husband that cheat and apologized and even doing all he could to win back your trust is worth forgiving, you have to be intertional about the forgiveness, sit your self down and talk to your self, no one can advise you better than yourself, the one seducing your husband is still out there waiting for you to pack out so that she can pack in.
Talk to God after talking to yourself, ask God to help you to forgive him and start fire branding your marriage with prayer. Don’t let there be any loophole for the devil, let the devil no he has fail over your marriage, not forgiving him will only be increasing the gap that has be created by the infidelity.