Dabota Lawson Dishes Advice On Love and Relationships
Former beauty queen, Dabota Lawson, shared a moving piece on marriage, love and relationships via her Instagram page.
The lovely mother of one, who certainly has had her share of bad experiences, following her broken marriage with Sunny Aku, adviced people to look for the signs of a controlling and abusive partner in a relationship. Read the piece below:
Anybody who comes into your life in the name of relationship then tries to isolate you from the people who love you such as family and good friends wants to DESTROY YOU.
Love should not feel restrictive . control, manipulation and obsession aren’t signs of true, passionate love — they are signs that your partner is controlling and manipulative. these are the signs of a potentially abusive partner, a partner who ; forces you to dress in a certain way . ….. forbids you from interacting with family or friends. ….. Makes You Feel Guilty When You Spend Time With Your Friends. ….. Criticize Lots Of Small Things That You Do in such a manipulative way that you don’t even know you’re being controlled . ….. Never allows you any form of privacy ,
Even people who are deeply in love are allowed to have some privacy. ….. claims to “protect” you by taking control of your finances, chasing away a friend, or keeping close tabs on where you are and what you’re doing at all times isn’t looking out for you — they’re trying to make you dependent on them. ….Apart from trying to cut you off your support system , they make you begin to question your own sense of judgment and eventually your sanity ….. A partner who Tries to indirectly scare , manipulate and control you by telling you scary stories of unfortunate events that has happened in the lives of people they have been in a relationship/ marriage with in the past and how they attacked /destroyed or dealt with people who dare offend them is an abusive person who will eventually become physically violent.
Please stop looking for hope in their “small kindness” , that really is about them and not you especially when they know they’re loosing you . This is a method used in order for you to reaffirm the lies that you tell yourself ” oh he has a soft side ” .
Emotionally bonding with an abuser is actually a strategy for survival for victims of abuse and intimidation. Please people stop judging people who are crying out for help . Stop it. Just stop it . Reach out … There is a thin line between life and death . Let’s not loose people we love because of the lack of self control and insecurity of another .
Photo Credit: Instgaram
Is she talking about her ex husband? Seems to me like she is. However, she’s very right. These signs are always there, people just choose to ignore them because they are in love.
ok