Dear MIMsters: My FIL Embarrasses Me With His Comments About My Parenting Skills

I am a mother of three. I always make out time to visit my parents-in-law just to see how they are fairing. On each visit, my FIL will always make me feel as if I can’t take care of babies with his comments and actions. He says things like, “don’t let that baby fall.” He embarrasses me when he says and does the following; 

“Mothers are always careless when it comes to carrying babies.”

“Do you even breastfeed the baby?”

“Cover baby very well,” even when baby is well covered or “uncover baby, he is sweating.”

“Hope the baby’s Diaper is dry.”

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He has always done this right from my the first baby I have till date. When my first born was over a year old, when we went visiting as usual. When the baby coughed, he just stood up, went to his room and brought out his own drugs. He insisted that I give it to my baby but I said no that he has his drugs.

I always smile each time he behaves this way and wave it off because I know he means no harm. He loves his grand children and only trying to be a good grandpa but I am beginning to feel embarrassed. Especially when he behaves this way in the presence of everyone including visitors. My MIL would always say, “You are trying (though I lost her mouths ago, she was such a lovely mother).

Yesterday, FIL did his usual thing in the presence of outsiders. When we were driving home, I told my husband that big daddy should give me some credit after being a mother of three. Told him how it makes me feel embarrassed. Note, FIL is not a doctor but a barrister.

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I am not a careless person and can take care of babies. I took care of my elder sisters’ kids long before I got married. The longest my mother has stayed for Omugwo (maternity care) is 8 weeks. Infact, she spent only 13 days after my last birth because she was not feeling fine.

So you see my fellow Mimsters, I am not a learner but FIL always makes me feel I can’t take care of my kids and it makes me feel embarrassed. I am trying not to get angry over this.