5 Things Your Teen Really Wishes You Knew

Are you raising a teenager? Note the following to help you understand them better and foster a healthier relationship…

1. No matter how much I pretend not to, I really need you.

It’s common for teenagers to act all grown, independent and shun your attempts at probing into what is going on in their lives but don’t let that push you away. They absolutely love the attention and care about what you think.

Continuing to show lots of interest in their lives, sharing your views and advice, offering a shoulder to lean on as well as a listening ear, even when they don’t show any appreciation, reassures them of your love as they pass through this self-discovery phase.

READ ALSO: Teens Write: 3 Ways My Mum Rocks, 3 Ways She Doesn’t

2. Reprimand me but without those endless lectures.

Some parents can go on and on when their teenagers err in the bid to put them on the right track but your teen will only get bored or irritated and shut you out. Imagine you talked for about 30 minutes and your teen only listened for 8 minutes – it means you were just talking to yourself the whole time without even realizing it. Keep your reprimands short and punchy to retain your teen’s attention and effectively drive your message home.

READ ALSO: 10 Keys to Parenting Your Teen Successfully

3. I need to make my own choices too.

Yes, he’s your child but his opinions about issues that affect him should count. Don’t nag or get into endless arguments in a bid to force your will down his throat. He doesn’t have to always agree with your opinions, suggestions or advice. Except against set moral or safety rules, respecting his views affirms his independence, enables him make mistakes and learn from them, boosts his confidence and hones his decision making and problem solving skills. What’s more, he’ll respect and love you more for it.

4. It’s hard to accept my mistakes when you never accept yours.

Some parents find it hard to accept their mistakes and apologize to their child. You’re only human after all and can’t be right all the time. So, whenever you assumed wrong, hurt or failed your child or made any other mistake, be humble enough to say sorry and show you really mean it. You’ll make it easier for your teen to admit his faults or mistakes by learning from your worthy example.

5. Forgive me but sometimes, I need some space.

Even if you’ve always shared an enviable relationship, there will be lots of times your teen just wants to be left alone – he probably doesn’t even know why either. Don’t feel rejected. Respect his need for some privacy.

If you suspect something is wrong, try to probe but drop the subject if he seems reluctant or unwilling to talk. Revisit later when he is in a better mood to open up.

Photo credit: longing4length.com