Controversial: Bettern Chero’s Opinion Of Single Moms May Gladden Or Displease You
A Kenyan woman identified as Bettern Chero has sparked a hot debate online after she took to her social media page to call out single mothers all over the world.
Chero, who was abandoned by her mom when she was barely 14 years old, shared her opinion on her Facebook timeline on Sunday, July 15; and her controversial post has since gone viral.
According to Chero, who was raised by a single father, people should stop glorifying single moms because they are losers and majority of them end up raising criminals and sluts as children.
Chero did not end there but further disclosed that although the world sees them as strong women but the sincere truth is that, only the happily married women are strong and mature because they endure a lot from their marriage unlike those who quit at the slightest opportunity they get.
She shared her opinion about single moms via 3 different posts on her Facebook wall.
See below:
“STOP GLORIFYING SINGLE MOTHERS. Before I get to the point of my article, let me state my disclaimer.
“I am in no way attacking Single Mothers, myself am a daughter of a single father! Single moms, excluding widows, are generally losers and they have big possibility to raise criminals and sluts you see around. If you’re a single mom these days you’re praised and heralded for your courage and strength in raising a child all by yourself.
It’s brave for a woman to take on the responsibility of being able to deal with a bad man that left her and put her in an unfortunate situation. But like most things, women, for the most part, we chose to put ourselves in this situation.
READ ALSO: Doris Simeon on Why We Have Single Mothers
Bad men don’t just magically appear in our lives as women. Bad men who leave women don’t just magically change and decide to leave the woman. And there aren’t only bad men to choose from. There are lots of good men out there too. But most single moms don’t want good men. Most single moms don’t know what a good man is. Let’s get back to basics.
Women totally we have the upper hand in choosing our partner. This is why men usually ask women out and not the other way around. This is why a man will have s*x with just about any woman and while a woman will not have s*x with any man.
It’s supply and demand. It is much easier for a woman to pick up a man than for a man to pick up a woman. And that’s fine and natural. You can’t have unplanned children if sex is planned. Every time you have s*x you have the risk of getting pregnant as a woman.
So there is no such thing as unplanned children. Of course there are exceptions like rape. The vast, vast, vast majority of single moms are not exceptions. They are choices that they made to have s*x. So when you have a child as a woman you made the choice to either have the child or to have s*x which has a possibility of creating a child.
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A child is a choice. Every woman knows her circle and she knows her danger days though during those days you feel to have s*x, stop! It’s not the man’s fault. You chose him. Again, women generally we choose men. Women have the final say on when and when not to have s*x. Many men will do anything or say anything just to have s*x.
That’s where choice comes in. You need to sift through the basics. You need to put your big girl thinking cap on and not believe everything you hear. You need to look past the words and into the character of people. You have way more at risk than the man. You also have way more options than the man. You need to be wise about how you proceed.
The fact of the matter is, no matter how much a single mother loves her child or how diligent she tries to be, it’s unlikely that she’ll be able to do as good a job of raising her child as a mother and father could have done in her place.
People hate to hear that, but it’s true. Incidentally, this isn’t me just talking off the top of my head. Statistics bear this out and show that many of the problems we have in our society, when you look a little deeper, are really caused by the number of out-of-wedlock births we have in this country, majority of suicides are individuals from single-parent households.
75 percent of drug abusers are from single mother parenting, more than half of all youths incarcerated for criminal acts come from single-parent households.
There are 2 main reasons as to why most single moms are single:
1. They picked a loser to begin with
2. They picked a good man and he left cause she scared him away
READ ALSO: Actress Lola Alao Shares Her Experiential Opinion about Single Mothers
Of course I’m generalizing, but there is truth to this generalization. Women who are happily married are almost always more wise and mature than single moms. It’s not a luck thing. Women choose their men. And married women choose better. Married women choose men that are more responsible, dependable and committed to a serious, stable relationship.
NATURE YOUNG LADIES DO NOT MISLEAD THEM !!
There are various factors that will lead to single parenthood such as divorce , wrong choices and not knowing what you want and ending with what you don’t want !
Parenthood involves two people who share ideas and moral upbringing of children including financial obligations ,but when you find yourself being single parent it means you struggle so much to fulfill this obligations and this the reason we say single parent are hardworking , of course yes they have to go extra mile to fulfill this parental obligations!!
In as much as we support the single parents as community and friends let us not glorify the situation as the best thing to extent loudly encouraging our young girls to join the situation !! Today I can tell you from the bottom of my heart, nobody wishes her child to be a single mother nor nobody whatsoever will wish anybody’s daughter to be single mother sadly we glorifying the situation to extent making young girls feel its the magical world to be in !!
Our mother left us young. I was barely 14years first born. I saw how dad struggled from washing our clothes to our school fee to our family unity and social interact !! As young girls kuna various issues we never learned from dad himself was unable to address them.
For instance I can dress as I see my friends do later to find a phone call from auntie saying nonoh aki how did you dress, humbly I answer mum kwani ni vibaya , she knew we humble, immediately evening she will come over tells us abcd and we took it positively , so any call from auntie I used to know there is something dad doesn’t want ,to extent we asked dad to tell us direct to avoid community norms and he opened up to address us as a brother than a dad and we managed through !!
See AlsoWhat am I saying , irrespective the situation that took you to single parenthood its fair enough not to encourage your daughter or anybody’s daughter to join the set up , its a challenging institution that few manage !!
In cases of widows or widower community emphatically assists them it sympathizes with them well enough ,uncles and aunties comes in ,cuzos comes in that way family comes out strong with boundaries !! But where a single by choice exists ( nobody whatsoever wants be single mother by choice something happened ) nobody much assists even uncles says hao ni watoto wa Joyce utaweza ni kaa mama yao tu , that is the background you can’t change but we live with it !!
READ ALSO: Ruggedman Has Harsh Words for Baby Mamas: “It is shameful”
You can chose to negatively take this as tantrums but deep down your heart you know you can’t wish anybody’s daughter to be single mother even that of your enemy !!
Lastly bad man doesn’t just exist , as a woman we control relationship , and from my heart can tell you this , the only thing that starts from highest is love and goes down as familiarity comes in ..
As a woman with your instinct you will know this relationship heads nowhere, men speaks anything to impress you to have sex , any man has no chose sleeps with anything as long as available !! Mostly women we go against right instinct thinking more sex to this man can change him ,dear you can’t train old dog new styles it will go back to its bad behavior !!
No man will walk from that door to start beating you ,in fact no beatings occurs in marriage ,its two mature idiots who don’t know how to sort out small issues that results to tantrums throwing hence results to physical assault weaker sex results to claim nachapua , noo its a lie !!
A man never wakes up one morning to be bad man noo its choices you saw it but married what is in him but not what he was !! Wrong choices dear !! I will hurt many but will heal many.
Last but not least , we don’t have unplanned children , any woman who receives periods knows her cycle and each and everyone knows her hey days ,and during that hey day each feels honey to make sex !! Why do it ?? What do you expect ?
How many times we tell you pills are 76% correct ? Some want to tag wrong man with a baby to have them in there life !! Dear why hurt entire of your life getting pregnant with scumbag? You have brighter life to live stop it !!
Hate me not , the silly man that walked out of you was your wrong choices and you saw it but you trusted your heart and disowned your head !! Heart has sympathy and love but head has reason and right judgement !!
Have great day from the daughter of the soil from the beautiful hills of sacho true blood of kamasia real tungo produce.”
Who agrees with her opinion?