Dear MIMsters: After All the Lies and Sacrifices, This Happened

After all the lies and sacrifices, this happened. His name is Tobi and I met him in January, 2015. We got talking and got along well even though we live in different states.

In February, Tobi visited me and insisted on meeting my mum which he did. A few months later, I visited him too. During my stay, my instincts kept telling me that something was not right. I took my time to search the house when he went to work and I found his wedding album.

I kept mum about it until the day I was to leave. I was about getting into the taxi taking me to the airport when I told him the things I discovered. He insisted that I stay back so we could sort it out, I turned deaf ears and left. He immediately sent a text that I should keep this information away from my mum until he explains everything to me.

I was already in love, so, I kept it to myself. We spoke about it on the phone and he explained how he was married and divorced. I didn’t believe him because I felt the pain of betrayal. Somehow, we sorted things out.

Then I was just a ND holder. I enrolled in an online course to while away time since the HND admission was at that time closed. I didn’t purchase it earlier because Tobi already got one for me within his location.
Using an uncle’s influence, I got a complementary form and got an admission. During this period, I was attending a catering class paid for by my boyfriend. I had no choice than to quit catering and focus on my HND program.

When I told Tobi about the latest development, he changed completely and our communication dropped.

We started speaking again when he traveled down to my place for my sister’s wedding. We spoke and agreed to continue the relationship but he went back and cut communication with me. He actually said I should enjoy my studies cause I disobeyed him.

Fast forward to 2017, he started chatting with me again and we reconciled. As usual, I boarded the next available flight and off, I went to visit him again. We got along well but then I knew something was not right and just then I saw Facebook pictures of him married again to another woman. I was so pained that I cried for hours.

I confronted him and he explained how he got married and how he found out she was already pregnant with another man’s baby and has already filed for divorce. I believed him. At this time, I was waiting for my NYSC posting. I fell in love again with the hope that things will be right this time. We planned that after my NYSC posting, I will move to his city. He spoke with my mum about this and promised to get me a good job.

In the meantime, I kept on visiting from my deployment state and things were smooth until few weeks ago when he changed and stopped communicating with me like before without any explanation. I kept on asking if have wronged him but he said no. I even asked if he is in love with someone else and he said no.

After my NYSC posting, I called him again to ask if we should go our separate ways and he just said OK. Right now, I am pained and heartbroken. After all the lies and sacrifices, he just left me. What do I do as I am typing this in tears?