Dear MIMsters: Is This Guy A Husband Material For Me?
I am asking for advice so that I won’t make a mistake in my life. Is this guy a husband material for me?
There is this guy who told me that he wants to marry me and he is very serious about it. I am in 300 level and I grew up with my foster parents. They took me in when I was a kid and they have been raising and training me up till now.
The guy who wants to marry me is related to them. He came to our house last year, saw me and he liked me. Mind you, this is not an arranged marriage. The problem with this guy is that since we started dating, he hasn’t given me money at all not to talk of N5 even though he is working and he is the manager at his work. He is paid and he knows that I am a student.
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The people training me are also training their four children in the university. Our mummy is the only one who provides because things are hard for our daddy at the moment. I don’t always collect money from them because I know they still have to send money to their other children and I am older than all of them.
This my guy hasn’t sent me any money but he trickishly collected N10k from me. I gave him with the hope that he will send the money back to me next day. He told me that his account had a problem and he needed the money urgently. He pestered my life that day. And before this happened, I had been begging him to help me with any amount he has to enable me work on my project and two seminars, and to pay for my house rent. He agreed but never sent any money.
The day he asked for that money, I did not have up to N500 and I told him but he kept disturbing me that he will give me back the money the next day when he comes to see me. We don’t reside in the same state. I went to school and borrowed the money from my girlfriend with hope that I will pay her back the next day when he comes. I trusted him because he is a very good christian who comes from a christian home.
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After I sent him the money, the next day I called him to know if he was still coming but he did not pick. I called him so many times and he later picked in the evening and told me that his bosses travelled in and he took them somewhere. This is someone who told me he was coming to see me. He didn’t show up, neither did he call to tell me that his bosses were around.
Meanwhile, the girl I borrowed the money from threatened me a lot to the extent that she came with some guys to beat me up but my landlord intervened. I couldn’t go to school for one week which made me miss lots of test and assignments. I called this guy and I cried to him, he assured me he will send the money but up till today he hasn’t sent the money.
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In fact, the story is very long and I can’t write it all here. What I need from you all is your motherly advice. I am 23 years old and I don’t want to make the mistake of getting married to the wrong guy. He told me that he has his reason for doing all these things, that he is only testing me. He said he will explain to me when we see but he has been disappointing me since then. He made another promise to visit me this weekend.
Are you sure this guy is really into you? Are you sure if he’s not a driver at his place of work and lied to you of being a manager? Pls do your findings well before taking any step.