Dear MIMsters: He’s Got all the Great Qualities But this One Important Thing Makes Me Want to Quit

I am 28, my fiance is 33. He has all the great qualities any woman would want in a man; a good job, good personality, caring, hardworking, God fearing, and is not a womaniser.

When people see us together, they always envy us, but deep down within me, I feel so disappointed. He makes me feel miserable in the bedroom because he’s a straight to sex kind of man. He doesn’t kiss, won’t touch me down there, not to talk of sucking me down there.

He only manages to suck my breast for about a second and then straight to sex. I have talked to him twice about this and all he could say was that he is an HSE (Health Safety and Environment) person and he’s very conscious of his health. So he avoids all those things to prevent bacteria infection.

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I told him, it’s not right for him to practice HSE in the bedroom with his woman, leaving me hanging all the time but he said it’s his career and he’s used to it. There are times he would release, I won’t know and I’m still positioned for doggy, only to hear the sound of him showering in the bathroom.

After taking his bath, he would go to the sitting room to watch film leaving me miserable on the bed. I’ve cheated on him twice with someone else and it felt like I had never had sex before.

He proposed to me last week. I accepted the ring because it was in a public place and I didn’t want to make a mess of him. My family feels he’s a good and perfect candidate for a husband. Nobody seems to understand me. In short, they’re all telling me sex is not food and I should teach him.

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Actually, I tried to teach him but he said he understands what I want but because of his HSE knowledge he can’t do all those things. Yet, he asks me to suck him, with a promising to retaliate. When I’m sucking him, he enjoys it but when I’m about rounding up, he acts like he’s snoring.

I’m worried because he does not want to change. Should I ignore that aspect of him and go on with the marriage or should I quit? I’m contemplating quitting since nobody wants to understand me.