Why Women Sacrifice Their Dreams for Marriage (Part One)

Adesua Iyoyojie

Women and sacrifice go together like peas in a pod. It is time for men, women and children to begin to recognize this common occurrence and take steps towards negating it.

Society, culture and religion expect a woman to build her home, if her career gets in the way of that, she has to sacrifice. They tell her to compromise but she goes as far as sacrificing.

Compromise and sacrifice don’t mean the same thing.

The main difference between compromise and sacrifice is that compromises require the work of both partners on their relationship, while sacrifice means disproportional giving on one partner’s part.

READ ALSO: ”Married Women in This Part of the World Sacrifice the Most”- Toyin Lawani

by Jumoke Simi August 22, 2017 in Celebrity Mums, Marriage 3 0

Compromise means willingness to reach reciprocal satisfaction, while sacrifice happens at the expense of one partner.

The art of compromise can be mastered only with reciprocated effort. It takes work and regular practice, even with the small issues. Sometimes such work can be exhausting, but it is a price worth paying for a healthy, satisfying, long-term relationship.

Mothers always put their children first.Mothers sacrifice their careers, dreams and goals.A mother’s love is unmatched. It doesn’t always have to be the mother who makes the sacrifices, men should take up the mantle and realize that they play vital roles in the parenting of their children.

Women are natural great multi taskers. A woman can cook, clean, wash, study, stay fit, do so many things at the same time. When the ability to multi task is not there, she let’s go of her dreams and focus on family. That might not entirely be the way out, men have to start helping women in achieving their dreams. When a man is supportive, the multi tasking doesn’t become too much of a burden

Time and time again, we see women caving to meet demands of society, a lover, a friend or a child. This is true, but it doesn’t mean it has to stay that way. As we discuss the sacrificial roles women, especially mothers, take on, let this be a call to men as well as the entire world, to help this class of women whenever and wherever they can.

Here are some reasons why women let go of their dreams:

READ ALSO: Should Women Sacrifice Their Dreams for Marriage? | Read This Story & Join the Discussion

1. They put their children first

Every mother does this. They feed their children before they eat, clothe them before themselves and will jump in front of a moving vehicle at the expense of their own lives. This is motherhood entrapped in the ultimate display of love. Nothing is too little or too much, mothers will always put the needs of their children first, even ahead of their own personal needs.

This is the singular reason why women are willing to drop out of their careers, lose sleep, lose firm boobs, and contend with a child through every stage of their life. This is the ultimate sacrifice, that mothers are willing to put their entire lives on the back burner just to make sure that they can give the best to their children.

2. Pregnancy

By consenting to pregnancy, a woman subjects herself to multiple changes that her body may never recover from.She willingly decides to put herself through the excruciating pain of labor to bring someone else to life.
Many women don’t return to their dreams after delivery.
They don’t get over that pregnancy phase.
They feel they have to nurture the child first before pursuing dreams

3. Lack of support

Fathers, husbands, brothers; appreciate your mother and the women around you, and help them; don’t let them bear these sacrifices alone.
A housekeeper or house help cant do much.
A woman strives to be better when the people she loves, show support.
When a woman has a supportive spouse. The sky is just a starting point

READ ALSO: ‘Mum sacrificed all to get me educated’ Young Graduate Shares Inspiring Photo To Celebrate Mum

4. The need to get married

Many women have been brought up to see a romantic partnership as the main event of their life,
No matter how successful, assertive, or powerful some women are, the moment they become involved with a man they begin to give up part of themselves — their social life, their time alone, their spiritual practice, their beliefs and values,”

Maybe that’s why when many women divorce, it feels so freeing. Suddenly, they have time to return to the things they love or find new interests. There’s no one to tell them not to do that, even if it’s their own voice inside their head that’s been telling them. They don’t have to please anyone other than themselves. And, of course, that independence, vitality and renewed passions are exactly the things that make her attractive to someone new.
By tossing away their own passions and interests, women lose their authenticity just to be married.

5. The need to succeed.

When she can’t cope with the career, dreams and family, she sees herself a failure.
Society praises and cheers women who stay and work on their homes even if it means sacrificing her goals, so be it.
A successful marriage means so much to a woman.

6. As a female child she was brought up and taught a man validates her.

So giving up her dreams to remain his wife, to have a crown isn’t too much of a thing to do.

Women don’t necessarily have to give up their dreams. They are always ways to aviod sacrificing dreams. You can juggle the two together.

We will discuss ways to pursue your dreams and raise a family in Part Two.