Dear MIMsters: Should I Leave My Guy For Another? I’m at a Crossroad.

I have been dating this guy since 2011 but I’ve met another. Now, I am at a crossroad. We met when he had just finished his youth service and a year later, he got a job in a company in another state. He’s the most loving and caring guy anyone could ask for. He shares whatever he’s got with me.

The problem is when his mom was alive, she never liked me for reasons best known to her. She was always fighting me to the extent she told people that her son and I will never get married. Meanwhile this guy is full of insecurities. Whenever he gets tipsy, he gets flippant resulting to violence sometimes that has almost ended my life.

After 3 years of working, he lost his job at the company and in church he was told his mom was responsible. Like everyone knows, she’s bad. I have witnessed a whole lot by her physically and spiritually that she even wished my mom dead and my mom died in October 2011. I’m not insinuating anything regarding to that.

I stuck with him all through prayers and all and just after a year he secured another job. I live with him but anytime I travel away to be with my family and friends, he picks up a fight which usually leaves me emotionally wrecked. He can’t deal with his insecurities and I haven’t give in to other guys because I love and respect and wouldn’t want to hurt him.

Fast forward to 2016, he lost his mom and I was also there for him. I never left his side for 8 months. I didn’t travel even. The issue now is I’m tired of living my life for him as nothing is forthcoming. He loves me no doubt but the financial aspect is either going back and forth and I’m 28 already.

I wanna give someone else a chance and at the same time, I don’t see myself hurting him because he’s going to be devastated. I know it’s not all about marriage but I’m not getting younger like I said. How long should I wait for things to get better? I have been helping out financially for a year now since hid job isn’t paying well.

For two months now, I’ve been seeing someone else. We have been friends since 10 months ago. He loves, respects and gives me attention. He is genuine as well. I need your advice as I don’t know what else to do.

5 Discussions on
“Dear MIMsters: Should I Leave My Guy For Another? I’m at a Crossroad.”
  • Would have left if the guy is financially stable? God is really trying ur faith if u can cope if u have less compare to when u have much. As long as the first guy love you, sit him down and plan together for better future,things will be better for both of u if u can endure.
    the second guy love ,respect and give you attention because you are yet to commit yourself to the relationship. I will advise you to seek God direction over these, not telling you to seek ur pastor advise, Pray alone. and it shall be well with you. beware of that second Guy ,cos you already vommitted your problem to him when you are just friends.

  • Pls don’t marry any man out of pity maybe considering how long you have been with him. Ask for direction. If the first relationship isn’t giving u a positive result, ask God to connect you to the right man. If it’s the person you are seeing now and You are comfortable and happy when you are with him, go ahead but first ask God for directions

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