Dear MIMsters: Will I Be Breaking the Girl’s Code If I Say Yes to Him?

I’m so confused right now about this matter. Will I be breaking the girl’s code if I say yes to him?

I had a close friend back then in secondary school. This was 11 years ago. She got admission into a higher institution and met this guy Tunde. They dated for a while and I also got to meet Tunde on the phone.

In 2012, they broke up. Mind you, I was not the cause of their break up and I also tried to help sort things out between both parties but my friend’s mind was already made up. She had moved on and was already involved with another guy.

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Tunde and I became friends and we met once in 2014. In 2015, Tunde asked me out and we started dating but we broke up due to lack of communication when he was posted to Kebbi state for his NYSC service. When he came back from service, he tried to reconnect with me but I didn’t give him an audience.

I briefed my friend about my relationship with her ex and how it ended and we both laughed it off.

Now, it’s 2018, yet Tunde is still pushing for us to come back and that he’s ready to settle down. He’s asking me to meet his parents and he wants to meet with mine too.

However, I have a number of questions and they are:

  1. Will I be betraying my friend if I say yes to Tunde?
  2. I’m not sure I’m ready or I even want to be with him because he is small in stature.
  3. I am not a virgin. Tunde and I have had sex before, but after that, I’d told him that if we ever got back together, I would like a no-sex relationship until after marriage. Even though he accepted, he told me he will get it elsewhere whenever he feels the urge.

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I’m 27 year old, in my final year, self employed and not in any relationship. Meanwhile, he’s 32 and employed. Is it advisable to say yes to him?

7 Discussions on
“Dear MIMsters: Will I Be Breaking the Girl’s Code If I Say Yes to Him?”
  • Abeg leave the guy and go your way. He will also look to get it outside when u get married.

    Personally, i think u can do better than that. Rrlationship is not marriage so be careful not to treat it as a relationship u can easily walk away from.

  • Advice that you ignore the proposal, not because your friend or the code thing. You should be sincere to yourself in terms of your love for this guy. There’re lots of issues you have with him: height and the rest. The guy has issues too, he doesn’t know what he wants. And, your friend may laugh it off with you in your presence and you think that is all. Don’t think so. Ignore it and move on.

  • What is important here is your heart. Do you feel you love him and do you feel you can spend the rest of your life with him?
    If the answer to these two questions is “Yes”, then go ahead. Dont miss the chance of a happy marriage to someone you care for.
    If you honestly dont love him or want to marry him, then give it a miss.
    All the best.

  • Hain! Are you kidney me! He will get it outside? It means the day you are sick or given birth and you are asked to stay off sex for a while he will get it outside.. Sweetie don’t try it o. He is already telling you that he will be a cheater!

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