Dear MIM Readers: “Could this my abusive husband be ….?”

I am a mum of a 15 months-old baby. I gave birth through normal delivery. Sex with hubby is great, peneratration takes time except when I’m extremely wet. I understand my body perfectly.
There was this day we made love we both climax and went to wash up, he didn’t return to the room and I went to look for him only for me to see him masturbating. I was so shocked and pretended not to see him. I kept asking myself if it was normal.

The wanking continued. He started doing it right in the bedroom when I’m asleep. The movement usually wakes me up. When I turn, he’ll quickly stop. I had to hide the lubricant I saw in the bathroom, yet it continued. The only time I confronted him was when I saw his singlet soaked wit sperm, he just kept quiet. The funny thing is, he makes me believe he’s not sexually active, doing it once is his way but later wakes up at night to wank.

Three weeks ago, I fell sick he had to take me to the hospital. On our way back we had an argument and he punched me right in my face. The impact made my baby to slip from my hand. Immediately he saw the baby was on the car floor, he got out and started punching me. My teeth started bleeding, and people rushed to save me. When I saw someone would be able to identify me, I left the scene and went straight to his father’s house. They weren’t happy with what he did and strongly condemned his actions and told him to apologise, which he did reluctantly.

Meanwhile, it wasn’t his first time, he hit me in February and locked my baby and I in the room then went out. We had a family meeting in February, he was told never to hit me again. I was so bitter because my two teeth was at the verge of pulling off, I decided I was done with the marriage coupled with his constant embarrassment in public and wanking habit, I packed some of my stuff and came to my parent’s house.

His family reached out to me. I got a call from his sister’s hubby, we talked about how to make the marriage work and I shouldn’t quit because a child is involved. That was when I asked him if it’s normal for a man that has a wife to masturbate, he was surprised and said no. He told his wife about it and she asked her brother, he didn’t deny it and gave her some reasons to justify his actions. He said my body isn’t as it used to be before I took in and he perceives an odour. I laughed because it’s funny since I use vaginal wash. Then she went on to say don’t I think there is something on ground. Standing firmly to justify this shameful practice.

I’m beginning to suspect him. He has this friend they grew up together. He was even an issue when I got married. They would lie and eat together. He told me he prefers the guy to me and that he’s the only one who gives him joy. He hates women, that all women are prostitutes. It was an issue when he learnt we were expecting a girl. He said it is not by giving birth, what matters is giving birth to the right sex. He goes as far as meeting our gate man no matter how dirty or smelling the room is to massage his back and pick hair from his body. Though my mind is already made up, I just want your opinion on this?