5 Ways To Keep Your Love Alive After Becoming A Parent

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Has your love life gone down-hill since the arrival of your baby or babies? You probably miss the way things used to be with your spouse but you love being a parent all the same. Who says you can’t have it all? Find how you can balance your love life while being a parent as suggested by pintsizedtreasures.

1. Don’t stop dating! To make time for each other, plan dates. One dad puts it this way, “you need to take a night off and go out with your spouse. It becomes too easy to just stay around the house because you’re tired, or to take the baby with you because you don’t feel comfortable leaving the baby with someone. But every now and then, the focus needs to be on just the two of you. You play different roles now, but it doesn’t mean that the old ones disappear. Being a father and mother doesn’t mean that you aren’t still a husband and wife anymore.”

Just because you are married with kids does not mean that it is the end of your date life. Call the grand-parents, your sister or a trusted friend to baby-sit your munchkin for a few hours— every week, if possible. Rotate people so you are not calling on one single person to baby-sit very often. Even if they are your friends, reimburse them for their time they invested in your bambino’s care and in your date-night life with your spouse. Short on funds? Have a date-night at home. After the baby is fed, changed and asleep for the night, start your date! Prepare your spouse’s favorite dinner and eat under the stars or have a picnic on your living room floor.

2. Look in the mirror. Don’t let your appearance slide down the drain during the baby years. I know, I know. You’re busy and you enjoy being comfy at home. But what about your hubby? He is out most of the day and sees people dressed all the way to their shoes—not their slippers. Staying attractive will also help boost your motivation and make you feel more attractive to your spouse. The majority of moms are more excited about their role if they take time to fix their hair, exercise, shower and wear attractive clothing. Your appearance does effect your attitude!

3. Communicate. It’s easy to lose track of what’s going on in your partner’s world outside of the home, when your child is born. Conversations and attention tend to revolve around your children and not your spouse. Take at least five minutes each day to ask your spouse about his day and have him ask about yours. Make a habit of doing this at a time when you can give each other your undivided attention. Really listen without judgment when your partner is talking and try to put yourself in his shoes. You’ll be surprised at how a little empathy can go along way in keeping you both connected.

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4. Pray. Always seek God’s help to guide your marriage and family. Many times He will lead us in a different direction and show us how to navigate through the storms and difficulties. God has the power to turn your and your spouse’s heart towards each other once again. He can bring back those butterflies and chemistry you once enjoyed.

5. Put Your Spouse First. One of the very best things you can do for your kids is to put your spouse first! Strong marriages make strong families. Not only does it provide your children with a sense of safety and security, but it shows them what real love should look like. If you are always putting your children before your husband, you are not doing them any favors. In fact, you’re doing them a great disservice. I get it – your husband is a grown man who can take care of himself and your children are small and need you. But do you know what they need the most? They need a happy home. And happy couples create happy homes. When you’re working together to be a better husband and wife – you will be better parents.