Dear MIMsters: Is There Anything I Should Do to Become Happy Again in this Marriage?
I am 25 while my husband is 31 and we have 2 kids together. I want to be happy again in my marriage. Please tell me what I should do after reading my story.
We started very well in our relationship until my husband went to live in a foreign country. I joined him last year, leaving back in my country my good job only to be with this man.
We had our second baby here in this foreign land where I don’t have any family or friends The problem is that since we came here, he has totally changed. He started drinking, making many friends, coming home late, becoming selfish, and sexting with other women.
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Even his sexual desire for me seemed to be gone which makes me lonely. I have tried all I can do as a women. Prayed. Cooked. But they were all in vain.
I’ve also talked to him so that we can go for therapy but he has refused. I don’t know what to do. I’m not financially stranded because he pays all the bills. He has even asked me that what else do I want from him everytime I want us to talk about our issues.
I moved here because I want a settled and lovely home where our family can be together. I feel like he is looking down on me because I no longer have a job here and finding one easily in a foreign land is difficult.
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I’m well educated such that if I return home, it won’t be too difficult for me to find a job. But I’m afraid of losing my family. Everybody knows how bad it is for kids to grow up in a broken family. What do I do?
Please tell me if there’s anything else I can do to become happy in my marriage again.
Get a job and get busy and ignore him or go back to your country.
Get a job sis. Job isn’t difficult to get in a foreign land depending on what kind of job u want to do. Check online, news letters and job centres. U can get jobs that u can work around your time for your kids.
If you are a christian, join a department, make friends at church. Go for programs that will make u happy. Staying at home constantly is a big reminder of you challenges. Go for window shopping. Do something to keep u busy my dear. Pressure is real and your children still need their mum alive and healthy. Your own family also need you alive. Remember that! God bless you and order your steps
You are not the problem. Remember that. Please do all you can to find a job. spend time on yourself and try to be happy.
You cant change a man from straying unless he wants to change. Protect yourself from stds and do what makes you happy. when he sees you are moving on without him, he will sit up.
Get busy, once you’re busy you will hardly notice his stupidity.
Please go out and get a job even if its less than what you expected. Get busy with your job and kids. Ask God for the grace to ignore him. Pretend he doesn’t exist. Go to the parks with ur kids. Join your church homecell or house fellowship, make friends and make conscious effort to be happy everyday. It might be tough but please try. By the time he realizes how independent, confident and happy you are, he will crawl back to you. Work and save up some money to empower yourself.