As parents, disciplining your child can be a fine balancing act as kids are naturally wind up merchants, continually testing the limits of how much cheek you can stomach. Find common discipline mistakes often made in the process that you absolutely have to stop making henceforth:
1. Losing it…always!
As frustrating as kids can be, reacting to them harshly will do nothing to change bad behaviour. Kids act out for all sorts of reasons. Hunger, tiredness, boredom, and so on. It’s up to you as a parent to figure out why they are being difficult. Discovering the root cause of a particular tantrum can resolve it easily.
You may also end up saying something you really didn’t mean to say. By then, it will be too late to retract them. Of course, it’s easier said than done as we are only humans, however, making yourself aware that there’s always need for self-control in this regard will go a long way in helping you keep your cool, regardless of how pissed off you may get.
2. Writing cheques you cannot cash
The same way you should not write a dud cheque is the very same way you should not make empty threats. If Ali does not want to tidy his room, it’s much better to make a threat that you can actually follow through. Threatening him with ‘ojuju’ that will never materialise will never work. Best to make him realise that there are real immediate consequences that can and will be enforced.
3. “Why can’t you be like your sister?”
Telling a child off for not doing a chore or being polite and comparing them to their sibling or any other child can be damaging to your child’s confidence.
We have all irresistibly at one point or another said, “Why can’t you be like Timi,” in a bid to coerce our kids to act better. Change tact and point out your expectations without unintentionally causing disaffection or initiating a sort of competition between your children.
4. Reacting to every situation
You really do not have to react to every single thing your child does. Either they are seeking attention or are just trying out a new skill. As long as they are being safe, try to ignore certain annoying but inconsequential behaviours. In other words, choose your battles wisely. Otherwise, your disapprovals simply blend into one long drone that kids start to desensitise to.
5. Giving in always
It is always a bad idea to bottle under pressure because you see it as an easy way out. If you have decided to ground Aisha for a week for hitting another child, sticking to this will send a message that you mean what you say. Letting her off after a few days just shows weakness. She is likely to repeat unwanted behaviours if she feels she will get off lightly.