Dear MIMsters: I Curse The Day I Met This Woman Who Has Remained A Thorn In My Flesh

I curse the day I met Sandra. She has been a thorn in my flesh. It is the worst day of my life though I had assumed it was the best. I had gone for a bid in a government establishment and virtually every staff I came across in that office, demanded for a bribe until I got to Sandra’s desk. She was open and did not ask for a bribe like her other colleagues. More so, she was of a great assistance to me and one thing led to the other, we started dating and ended up married. We got wedded in March, 2000.

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The first sign of danger I saw was ‘spendthrift Susan’. I gave her N250,000 to keep in her account. It was the profit from a business I did in 2001. A month later, when I asked Susan for the money, she couldn’t account for it. Well, I allowed it to slide but then, again and again, and again, she showed me how irresponsible she could be with money. When we had our son, Andy, I asked Susan to resign from her government job. I asked her to name any kind of business she would like to run and she said she wanted a boutique. I opened one that ran into thousands of Naira for her but 6-months later, only naked mannequins were standing in her shop. Whatever happened? My wife couldn’t give a logical explanation. Now, to top Susan’s reckless spending, she can lie for Africa.

Till date, I have opened nothing less than 4 different businesses for her yet, none survived her lifestyle. Maybe if I knew what she has been doing with money, maybe …

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Suffering from secondary infertility, Susan persuaded me that we should go for IVF, and I obliged. Can you believe that Susan ‘ate’ the money set aside for the treatment? And when I asked her what she did with it, she could not give me any cogent response. That was the day I knew Susan was doomed. I thought of ways to put her away and an opportunity provided itself. I applied for visa for Susan and Andy and when it was granted, I sent them to Europe while I stayed back here. Immediately Susan was out of the way, I faced my business squarely and I started making good money. Of course, I was still responsible for their upkeep even though she claims to have a job. Truth be told, I did not visit them much but technology helped us stay in touch.

In 2015, Susan reached out to me with claims that Andy got admission into a university in Europe. The admission letter was sent to me, and I append my signature on the accompanying forms. And even though the cost was high, I thought this was for my only child so I should not allow anything hold me back from giving my maximum support. I sent every money Susan and Andy requested for towards his academics to them without asking questions.

And believe me, I sent millions of Naira to them in the last 3-years. They also forwarded Andy’s school results to me from time to time. I could see that he was doing quite well in school and I felt proud. I promised him I would attend his graduation ceremony but somehow, both mother and son subtly told me they would rather I sponsored their visit to Nigeria after the graduation ceremony. They asked me not to bother coming over to Europe.

Well, I was going to sponsor their coming to Nigeria but I also thought to surprise them at the ceremony by going unannounced. I emailed the school, requesting to know when Andy’s graduation ceremony would be holding and just like that, I received the shock of my life!

The whole admission story was a fraud. The school has no record of anyone like Andy. To add to my pain, mother and son got involved in fraud and were deported back to Nigeria.

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What I know clearly is that I cannot stay under the same roof with both mother and child, I would kill them so I have asked Susan’s people to come and take back their daughter. I do not want the bride-price returned, I just don’t want her around me. I have wasted 19-years of my life raising a false family. Where do I start from? At 52-years old, can I regain those lost years? I do not want Susan and her son anymore, but can I start a new family with another woman at this age?