Woman Who Was R@ped By Stepfather From Age 8 Reveals The Excuse He Gave When She Confronted Him In Front Of Her Mum
A British woman who was sexually abused by her stepfather at the age of eight has spoken out to urge victims of the crime to come forward and get help.
Michelle Sallis, 27, from Wigan, Greater Manchester, detailed the moment she confronted her rapist, David Sallis, 47, years later, eventually resulting in his conviction.
Michelle was subjected to horrific sexual abuse at the hands of David, a man her mother met when she was six years old, who then began raping her two years later.
For years, the now 27-year-old kept her abuse a secret, revealing as a young girl she had âno idea what it [the abuse] wasâ, but knowing she was terrified of what would happen if she spoke out.
Eventually, after learning about consent and realising she had been raped, Michelle found the courage to confront Sallis in front of her mother where he admitted: âI just wanted to know what it felt like to have sex with someone else.â
Michelle said she endured years of terror at the hands of the rapist, including one instance when he abused her in her mum’s bed when she was ‘flat out with sleeping tablets’.
Sallis is now beginning a 14-year jail term after admitting five counts of rape, and assault by penetration, at Preston Crown Court in northern England, according to local reports.
UK laws protect victims of sexual assault being identified, but Michelle has waived her anonymity to encourage other victims of the crime to come forward and get help.
Recounting her experience, she explained:
“My stepfather raped me in my own bed, in my bedroom, as a little girl. It was the one place I should have felt safe.
âFrom the moment I met him, I was wary of him and anxious around him. Perhaps I had a sense, even as a little girl, that he was a monster.
âIt was only aged 16, when I learned about consent at school, that I realised it was so wrong. It took me years to pluck up courage to confront him and he just admitted it, as though it was no big deal.â
Sallis began abusing Michelle, an auxiliary nurse, not long after she was a bridesmaid at his nuptials to her mum.
She explained further:
âHe assumed the role of my dad and was very strict, sending me to bed earlier than usual, not allowing me to have a night-light. He did the school run too.
âHe worked as a cleaner in a pub and would take me to work with him on Saturdays, saying my mum âneeded a break.â
âMy own dad wasnât around, and I had no relationship with him. I was wary of strangers, and of men in particular. I didnât even feel comfortable in the same room as him.
âIn the evenings, heâd leave my mum watching TV downstairs, and come up to watch a film with me in my room.â
Michelle continued:
âIt started with touching, and it progressed until he raped me. I had no idea what it was, but I knew I hated it. Because I wasnât used to having a dad, I presumed maybe this was what all dads did.â
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Sallis continued attacking Michelle as often as three times a week, often in her bedroom, but sometimes at other locations. Michelle said:
âIt happened a lot in my bedroom. Heâd pitch a tent in the garden and abuse me there, or heâd get in the paddling pool with me. Once, he took me camping, and he raped me in a field. He even abused me in mumâs bed when she was flat out with sleeping tablets.â
Michelle said Sallis âmade me promise not to tellâ which resulted in her living in fear she would be âtaken away if I ever confided in anyoneâ. She also became âvery withdrawn, confused and sadâ, she explained.
Aged 12, Michelle began staying with a schoolfriend to avoid the abuse, and gradually it petered out. She added:
âIt could be that the abuse stopped because Iâd hit puberty. But I think probably he just didnât get the opportunity anymore. I spent so little time at home and in my teens, I moved in with a pal from school.â
But it was only as a teenager, aged 16, during a lesson at school about consent, Michelle finally realised what had truly occurred at home. She went on:
âI had always thought of rape as a violent act â an attack by stranger down a dark alleyway. I didnât associate this with what had happened to me.
âYet I also slowly realised that it was the worst betrayal of all to be raped by my stepdad, in my own room, in my own bed.â
The gravity of this realisation took its toll, with Michelle stating she tried everything to try and put the horrors of what happened behind her. She revealed:
âIt was a lot to deal with. I tried all sorts of new starts, moving house, getting a new job, meeting a new partner, but nothing helped.
âI drank a lot, to blot out the memory. I felt like I was constantly running, constantly fleeing the memory of the abuse.â
Eventually, Michelle felt like she couldnât take it anymore and confronted Sallis in front of her mother and other family members.
She was stunned when he admitted it immediately, saying: âI just wanted to see what it was like to have sex with someone else.â
In sentencing, Recorder Michael Maher praised Micelle for her bravery, and said Sallis ârobbedâ her of a normal life. He said:
âYour sexual deviancy robbed her of her formative years and damaged her adolescent and adult life. I have listened in total to her victim personal statement and the profound impact it has had upon her.
âWhile you have pleaded guilty I donât accept that you have any remorse. I believe you are dangerous as defined by statute and you do pose a risk of significant harm.â
Michelle, who has a partner, James, said she felt the sentencing was probably about right, given the guidelines but stressed âhe can never be adequately punished for what he didâ. She revealed:
âApart from the officer in my case, who was brilliant, I had no support. Itâs been a hard journey, but I feel as though the burden has been lifted.
âI would encourage all other victims of abuse to speak out and to get help. Staying silent is what enables perpetrators.
âThe shame belongs to the abusers, and not to the survivors.â