Dear MIMsters: Am I Overrating this Romance With My Cyber Friend?
I met this guy online and we got talking. Shortly after, we became cool cyber friends.
We could chat for hours, tell each other our experiences of the day and stuffs like that. Soon, I noticed that I started having a soft spot for him.
I took a great deal of liking to him and noticed he did the same too. Later, we decided to meet physically He initiated the idea though and since we live in the same city, I went to his house.
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Before I went to his house, we had a bet and we agreed the looser owes the other a kiss. At the end of the day I lost, so I was to kiss him. The day I went to his house we actually kissed and one thing led to the other and we had sex. We’ve had sex so many times after that.
Well, I won’t lie he was all loving and stuffs and I don’t have any regrets about what happened. The only issue I am having is I feel like I am the one over rating the whole thing because I call and chat with him almost everyday.
My friends have noticed everything and asked if we are dating. I said no because as far as I know, he’s never officially asked me out to be his lady. So they suggested I make the first move. They said after all, we are both mature and stuffs like that.
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The thing is the African woman in me, especially the Igbo woman in me won’t let me do this. It’s kind of shameful and embarrassing.
But I have been asking myself why people in this part of the world believe it the man’s place to ask the woman out. Everyday, I find myself falling in love with this guy. My friends keep telling me that if I keep acting shy and embarrassed, some other girl brave enough will come and ask him into a relationship.
My friends have advised me to go for it.
There’s no written code that says the man must do the wooing. Go for it girl.
if u can have sex with him wtout him asking you out or a commitment u should be able to ask him out without any form of shame…so go ask him to avoidstories that provoke the soul
Ladies,learn to guard your heart and close your legs. Seeing a guy for the first time and already betting with a kiss? and it didn’t even stop at a kiss!! My dear playing hard to get would have been nice, people epecially guys treasure what they work for. It’s Ok to tell a guy how you feel but that should have come before the sex and after several dates and observations. If your fear is another girl taking him,hahahahahahaahah how are you sure another girl doesn’t already have him? Ladies it’s very simple and cheap for a guy to call and ask about your day and ask if you’ve eaten and all those jargon they ask on daily basis,WhatsApp call is almost free, network bonuses are always available, it’s free data here and there. A real man should do extra work in wooing and more especially imparting your life positively and to a large extent for that matter before your even consider having him as a boyfriend, sex should come when he has proven himself beyond every reasonable doubt that he’s deserving of your love. It’s not every man that says hello you rip your pant off for. Keep your feelings to yourself,infact quench it for now,if he’s serious he’ll come for you and if he doesn’t come which will not come as a surprise, count your losses and move on and do better next time. Tough love yeah? I just had to give you the raw truth. I pray this gets approved.
Opening your legs shouldn’t have been on the top of the list.